


Bittersweet Grief

by kristsune



Category: Rusty Quill Gaming (Podcast)
Genre: M/M, Shared Grief, minor implied pining for zolf/hamid, spoilers for 156, these two just really needed to hug it out
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-22
Updated: 2020-05-22
Packaged: 2021-03-03 02:35:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 485
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24317422
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kristsune/pseuds/kristsune
Summary: Zolf and Oscar already grieved Sasha once, now they can remember her.
Relationships: Zolf Smith/Oscar Wilde
Comments: 14
Kudos: 61





	Bittersweet Grief

**Author's Note:**

> Just a little something for my Wilde Riders <3 love you folks, y'all are a constant inspiration <3

There was a knock on Zolf’s door for the second time that night. He had already gotten Hamid tucked into his own bed, well, after he managed to detangle him. He was sleeping the whiskey off well enough, and if Zolf took an extra moment to watch him do so, well, no one would really be the wiser. 

He opened the door to see Oscar in the doorway, and let him in without a word, closing the door behind him. Oscar raised an eyebrow at the open whiskey bottle, Zolf just replied with a simple “Hamid,” Oscar nodding in response.

Zolf sat heavily onto the chair while Oscar poured himself a finger of the decent quality whiskey (he wasn’t sure where Carter swiped that one from, but it had been a good choice), and finished it in a few quick sips, which meant he was in a better headspace than Zolf, but not by a large margin. 

Oscar took a deep breath and met his eyes, and simply stated, “She lived.” 

Zolf could already feel his eyes burning again, he’d cried so damn much lately, and he was getting tired of it. He rarely felt better afterwards like so many people claim; he was always just left feeling rung out, and exhausted, and with a wicked headache. 

“Yeah, s-she did.” Zolf had stopped being self conscious when his voice broke around Oscar months ago.

Oscar put the glass down, and gently dropped to his knees in front of Zolf, who held out his arms so Oscar could tuck his face into the crook of his neck. Zolf wrapped his arms around Oscar, burying one hand into his hair, the other around his shoulders, holding him close. Meanwhile, Oscar gripped the back of the chair tight, like he was holding on for dear life, like if he let go of Zolf and the chair, he’d be pulled under in a sudden rip tide. 

Zolf tucked his face into Oscar’s hair, feeling both Oscar’s shaking silent sobs, and his own tears falling down his cheeks. They had both grieved Sasha, and the others, back when they were sure they weren’t coming back. When they thought they were lost to backfired magic, or death, or some fate worse than either of those. And though Sasha was lost to them, she got to live the life she never did while in Other London, happy and free, doing what she loved best. 

Zolf knew some of Oscar’s tears were for Grizzop, who died in battle, and even from the little he had heard about the Artemisian paladin, Zolf knew he went out the way he would have wanted to, protecting the pack. 

They stayed like that well into the night, together with a shared bittersweet grief, taking what little comfort they could in each other, and knowing Sasha got to live her best life, even if it was without them. 

**Author's Note:**

> Feel free to come say hi over on [tumblr](https://kristsune.tumblr.com/) or [twitter!](https://twitter.com/Kristsune)

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Bittersweet Grief [podfic]](https://archiveofourown.org/works/24319045) by [KD reads (KDHeart)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/KDHeart/pseuds/KD%20reads)




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